


Don't Stay Out in the Cold

by Fweeble



Series: Come In From the Cold [3]
Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: AU, Banjou-centric, Day 5, F/M, Family of Choice, M/M, Tokyo Ghoul Week, background KaneHide, character introspection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-12
Updated: 2014-10-12
Packaged: 2018-02-20 21:51:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,569
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2444423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fweeble/pseuds/Fweeble
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Banjou fell in love with the imperious curve of her smile, the arrogant tilt of her head. She was a star, she burned so brightly, and Banjou willingly fell into her orbit, just to be that much closer to her shine. </p><p>--</p><p>Alternatively: How Kamishiro Rize lead Banjou to Kaneki Ken, hope, and family.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Don't Stay Out in the Cold

**Author's Note:**

> Emperor: fave male character, solid foundation
> 
> The wonderful wisiaden beta'd for me once again. Thank you so much, dearest! All mistakes you still see are due to my own error. ; u; (And while Banjou isn't my fave, he's one of my babies and he deserves more love.)

Banjou fell in love with the imperious curve of her smile, the arrogant tilt of her head. She was a star, she burned so brightly, and Banjou willingly fell into her orbit, just to be that much closer to her shine.  _She’s trouble_ , everyone told him _, get out while you can. She’ll be the end of you._  Banjou can see it, he can see himself lying in his own blood by her feet as she rears back her head and laughs, revealing the long, pale line of her throat. And he knows that he would forgive her, that there would be nothing to forgive, because he would gladly hand over his life if it meant she continued to live as freely and as breathtakingly beautiful as always.   
  
She broke all the rules, cared little about the word of the law, and even Banjou knew it would one day catch up to her.   
  
The day Rize became a supernova was a day that was long in coming, a day Banjou had helplessly tried to prolong, by one minute, one second. Despite all his desperation, all he could do is watch as she burned until nothing was left, a dead star.   
  
_It was inevitable_ , he told himself,  _stars never last forever._  
  
Still, he grieved. He grieved for his loss, for the passing of a woman so vibrant and vital that he could never look away. She shone so brightly, so strongly.   
  
_Move on, Banjou-san. There’s no point in you wasting away over her. She would’ve forgotten you in a heartbeat._  
  
Reciprocity was never his goal. It had no bearing over his feelings for Rize or his decisions regarding her. Banjou had always known that his love would always be unrequited. He accepted that, had accepted her and his place in her life, which was nowhere at all. While Rize was so important, an all-encompassing presence in his heart and his life, he knew he was a stray leaf caught in the wind for her.  
  
So he spent his days drifting through the streets of Tokyo, thoughts of his lost love crowding his thoughts. His nights were spent scavenging, devouring the dead and dying. He clung to her memory, emulated what he could and tried to keep her alive in his heart, in him.  
  
_You have to stop; this is getting out of hand. You know you’re going to attract attention. You don’t want to end up like her, do you?_  
  
He didn’t. Even in a world without Rize, Banjou had no desire to die, to be hunted like a criminal. But that was what he was becoming, that was the path he has somehow strayed onto while chasing the ghost of Rize.  
  
\--  
  
On a sleepy autumn afternoon, Banjou smelled it –the scent of spider lilies and blood. Rize.  
  
\--  
  
Kaneki Ken isn’t Banjou’s new star. He isn’t a replacement. He isn’t Rize.  
  
But Banjou owes Kaneki this peaceful life he has now.   
  
He can walk down the streets a free man, a free ghoul, because of Kaneki. The other man who was just as astray as Banjou was, who had just as much yearning for what he lost as Banjou had, gave him purpose. There was a time when Banjou was convinced it was fate that allowed their paths to cross, that it was his duty to guard this once-human who held in him Rize.   
  
A chance to redeem himself.  
  
And so he stopped –he stopped his nightly prowls and his tears dried, they no longer stained the blood of the dead he found in the bowels of Tokyo. He followed Kaneki, his second chance, stood by his side, a guardian sentinel.   
  
Kaneki never needed Banjou by his side. He had, long ago, clawed himself up from depths that Banjou couldn’t fathom, and emerged strong. All Banjou could do was stay by his side and watch, a mockery of his past with Rize –but Kaneki welcomed him. Gave him a place to stay, helped him blend back into society, to rediscover the hope cradled within the human world.   
  
Kaneki Ken saved Banjou with his kindness. Even as the other man fell, lost in his own nightmare, he had offered Banjou his hand and his concern, and had saved Banjou.   
  
\--  
  
“I’ve been meaning to properly introduce you to someone,” Kaneki hedges over the phone as Banjou picks his way through the throng of passengers and shuffles off the subway. “Do you mind if I invite someone else for dinner tonight?”  
  
Once a week, Banjou goes over to Kaneki’s apartment and has dinner with the ghoul and his charge. It is time to bond, to reconnect, because they are family no matter how far across Tokyo Banjou has settled, it will not change.   
  
“Of course, it’s not a problem at all.” Should he drop by the CCG-approved butcher’s by the sports store, he wonders. “I brought some coffee. A coworker went abroad and brought back some fancy Italian blend.”  
  
“Thank you, Banjou-san.”  
  
He buys a small package of liver, just in case.  
  
The sun is setting when he reaches the small apartment complex. He rings the doorbell, hears Hinami’s excited cry of “Banjou-san!” and the pitter patter of her feet as she rushes to open the door. His heart sings –he’s home.  
  
“Welcome back, Banjou-san,” Kaneki calls from the kitchen, “Dinner should be done in a few minutes.”  
  
“I brought some liver. I thought I should bring something nice to share since we’ll be having a guest.”  
  
A blonde head pokes out from the kitchen. “Cool! I wonder if we can sauté that.”  
  
Banjou toes off his shoes, feels so very uncultured as he stutters, “I-I don’t know. I’ve never cooked my meat before.”  
  
“Kaneki never did either!” The stranger sweeps into the entrance way, takes Banjou’s coat and hangs it, graciously accepts Banjou’s offerings and, presumably, hands them over to Kaneki before drifting back into the living room. “Hi! I’m Nagachika Hideyoshi! Nice to meet you!”   
  
Banjou shakes the proffered hand, can’t shake the feeling of strangeness, and says, “I’m Banjou Kazuichi. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”  
  
“I’ve been dying to meet you! Kaneki has told me so much about you. I’m told you’re the reason why I had breakfast the morning after I met Kaneki.”  
  
Human.   
  
This man is the human that broke into the apartment three months ago.  
  
“Y-yes…” His heart races –he needs to find the right words, the right nuances, the right movements –  
  
“Oh, don’t be so nervous! Relax, relax, I know! It’s no biggie.” The blond leads him over to the couch, waves Hinami over and says, “Hinami-chan, why don’t you keep Banjou-san company while Kaneki and I sort out dinner?”  
  
Banjou feels ill. “W-will we be eating human food tonight?” He hadn’t prepared himself for this. “Or is…is Nagachika-san…”  
  
“Hide-san is making his own food,” Hinami chirps, “although he’s sort of convinced Onii-san to try cooking, too. It’s actually pretty good.”  
  
A startled cry rings from the kitchen. “Hide, no! You picked up the wrong oil! That’s  _not_  vegetable oil.”  
  
“I thought this was my left over bacon drippings.”  
  
“That most definitely is  _not_.”  
  
“Oh.” There are sounds of scraping, “And here, I cut the liver for you.”  
  
“Thanks. Are we supposed to sauté this?”  
  
“I don’t know. Never cooked any kind of liver before.”  
  
Banjou eyes the kitchen apprehensively, “Are you certain they know what they’re doing?”  
  
“No. But it’s fun.” She smiles at the brightly lit kitchen, the cacophonous clatter of pans and laughter. “It’s fun when Hide-san is here.”  
  
“Dinner is served!” The human calls as he walks out, balancing steaming plates and empty bowls as a worried Kaneki trails behind him with a large pot. “Everything is okay to eat except the fried rice.”  
  
“I still think that sounds disgusting, Hide. Bacon and fried rice.”  
  
“Bacon is pork. Pork is good with fried rice.”  
  
Kaneki carefully sets down the pot on a coaster and takes off the lid and peers uncertainly into the contents within. “We thought we’d try a soup but we’re not quite sure how successful it is.”  
  
“It’s tough cooking without aromatics. I feel for all the ghouls in the world. A life without green onions is no life at all.”  
  
“I tried adding some things we don’t usually eat for a more well-balanced diet.”  
  
“That’s right! Hinami-chan is still growing, you need to make sure to feed her nutritious meals.”  
  
“Hide, shush.”  
  
They settle around the table and Banjou picks up his bowl with apprehension. He casts his glance over at the human as he ladles some of the soup into his bowl, feels his heartbeat race as he brings a spoonful up to his mouth. He waits for the inevitable look of disgust and revulsion to cross the blonde’s face even as he tells himself it would never happen. Kaneki would never allow such a person near Hinami. But his anxiety remains as he waits, as he watches Kaneki gnaw at the ribs he’d baked while talking with the human.  
  
The human laughs, leans over and kisses the side of Kaneki’s mouth. Kaneki glows with happiness and Banjou understands.   
  
“Banjou-san, have you tried the liver?” The human –Hide, passes the plate over, “You have to hurry before the glutton over here eats it all.”  
  
“Hide!”  
  
Hinami giggles behind her hand and Banjou smiles.  
  
  
This is his family. This is his home.  
  
  
  
This is where he belongs.  
  
  



End file.
